A few nights ago, my husband and I attended a seminar at the co-op preschool our children attend. Our guest speaker was a financial planner and she spoke mainly about how to teach your children to use money responsibly and instill in them a sense that they need to work for the things they want. Her recommendation was to start a comission based allowance program when your children are very young, beginning with a few simple chores that they are paid daily for completing, and then modify it as your children get older.
I have wavered back and forth on the idea of giving my children an allowance that is attached to chores. Part of me thinks that they should do chores just because they are part of our family and it is their responsibility as a member of our family to help out. Another part of me wants them to know what it is like to work and save for something that they really want. One thing that my husband and I have considered doing is requiring our son to be responsible for picking up his own toys and clothes without receiving a monetary reward, but giving him an allowance for doing other things like feeding the cat or stocking the cupboards after we return from Costco. Then there is the part of me that doesn't want them to worry about money at all until they are teenagers. I know it is central to our way of life, but I don't want them to grow up too fast and think too much about what they can buy.
The speaker also touched on consumerism and commericialism. Then today, our co-op preschool went on a trip to a locally based company that produces children's dishware. You know, the kind plastered with cartoon characters. I thought the juxtaposition of the two events was interesting.
I thought they were going to let the kids meet the designers and see the process of how the dishware is created. I think it would have been valuable for them to see what goes into making a product. Instead, they had the kids participate in a focus group and asked them to name each of the characters on the dishes and tell who was their favorite and least favorite. I guess I just didn't see the value in that, I already feel like it is hard enough to shield my kids from all the advertising everyone in our society is bombarded with. My husband and I record most everything we watch and fast forward through the commercials, and our son mostly watches PBS or videos from the libarary or Netflix. We also don't buy many products for our children with characters on them.
I'm curious to know what others' thoughts are on allowance for children and consumerism/commericialism aimed at children, so leave me a comment! Two different topics, but definitely related in my opinion.
2 comments:
We run our TV through a computer first so we can edit out all the commercials. (It is esentially a Tivo and it is wonderful!) I rarely hear, "I want that." The down side is I never know what movies are out.
We also buy few items with characters, but that is harder now that my son (3 1/2) loves Dora and Diego. Often grandma and grandpa buy shoes, etc with them on the side. I try not to get frustrated, after all - I let him watch those shows.
I think that allowance can be ok. Or it can be not OK. I think what is most important is that your children see and be involved in your budgeting. I know a family that goes to the store and gives her sons each 5 dollars. They buy their snacks for the week. They are learning what things last longest and how the way they use the money ends up relating to what they have. Ryan and I have really struggled with this. On our own, aside from kids. Ryan was always just given money and asked to do chores completely unrelated to the money. But he knew how much things cost. He knew how much his parents made and how much they spent on things. I had to make a yearly budget that figured in everything I needed- make up, magazines, entertainment, gas, etc. I started this when I was 12. I only knew my piece of the picture. Then I divided it by 52.4 (weeks in a year) and then we reevaluated quarterly. I had to do this through college. Very much like a business. When I got married and saw we made like more then 40,000 a year I was amazed. It seemed like so much money and I was so tired of figuring everything out. My parents in essence had burned me out and not taught me to be frugal. So I spent more and more money. Until we had Oliver and we realized what we had was a lot of stuff and a lot of debt. Ryan never said anything about my spending. We didn't talk about money. That is one things his parents never did: talk about stuff, work out problems, etc. I think that allowance can be good or feel like a prison. I think it depends on the kid. But, I also think that what I want to instill in my children is planning, contributing, and saving. Not based on performance but based on communication and communal decision making. There are times we are able to do that with the kids now. And as they get older i want them to know how much we make and see our budget. I wish I had seen how my parents allocated their money. But, I think the biggest gift I can give them is living with less stuff now. Getting them what they want, but only a few things and saying no to the rest. Being generous with them and helping them prioritize what they want and why. I am sort of in the no to chores based allowance group. But, I don't know that I am right. M
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