Saturday, May 8, 2010

Mom Friends

Often I think that my friendships with other women depend not on whether we have things in common or enjoy eachother's company but on whether or not we have children that play compatibly. Most of my get-togethers with other women are playdates for our children. This isn't to say that I don't love my mom friends, I do, but I wonder about the other women I have missed the chance to get to know because our kids weren't the right ages to play together or didn't seem to hit it off.

I also worry about what will happen to my friendships with other moms as our kids grow and go in different directions. It has already happened with a few friends that had children in Sammy's preschool. Once our kids went to kindergarten at different schools and we didn't see each other every week, it became difficult to maintain those friendships. I suppose that is the natural way of things--life changes and people move on and new people come in to fill the gaps.

Jeff and I have two couples that we have been friends with for a long time, one set since college and the other since we were new parents together. We don't live near either couple anymore, but we still make an effort to stay in touch (and I mean more than just on facebook) and see each other when we can. Sometimes our kids get along with their kids and sometimes they don't, but that doesn't change the adults' friendships. Somehow I think we'll always be friends with those people--we'll be going on senior cruises with them and talking about our hip problems with each other. I hope some of my mom friends will make it into that category of forever friends--that our connections remain even when our circumstances change.